I’m speaking of “Hobbit 3,” released yesterday. It was my birthday gift to myself. What a mistake. It was dreadful. I can’t imagine what all the glowing reviewers were thinking about.
First, it’s just a bloated battle epic, with little dramatic content. Second, Thorin’s descent into and recovery from gold madness are completely unconvincing. Third, the ultimate attack of the Gundabad orcs never materialized or, if it did, I somehow missed it. Fourth, there was no resolution whatsover. The interminable battle finally ends and Frodo just walks home. That’s it. Who becomes the new dwarf King under the Mountain? What accomodation did the dwarves reach with men and elves? These questions, about the which endless battle was fought, are left unanwered. Perhaps the footage was left on the cutting room floor, and will appear in the inevitable extended edition.
Which I was buy out of a sense of obligation and to complete my library of all 6 extended editions. “The Lord of the Rings” was and remains — after 50 (!) viewings — a magical movie experience. In fact, last night, after wasting our afternoon at “Hobbit 3,” I showed my girlfriend, India, the “Ride of the Rohirrim” from “Return of the King,” just to show her how rousing Peter Jackson’s initial vision of Middle Earth was. He completely lost his way. My memory of the experience will be one of faded glory, and I am sad.
SO SAYS THE SENTINEL.
National Debt: $18.016 Trillion
Annual Interest on Debt: $266.650 Billion
Annual Budget Deficit: $479.955 Billion
Unfunded Entitlements: $115.924 Trillion
WE ARE BANKRUPT AND INSOLVENT.